Dr. Couch, what is the difference between gossip and simply sharing information? I am confused on this question.
The Greek word for gossip is psithyrismos. As a noun it is used
in Rom. 1:29; 1 Tim. 3:11, 5:13; 2 Tim. 3:3 and Titus 2:3. As a verb it
is used only once in 2 Cor. 12:20. There are two other related words:
slander (katalaleo) which is also found in 2 Cor. 12:20. It means “to speak against.” Then there is the name of Satan (diabolos)
that is also often translated slander(er). Technically, it means “to
throw against” as in attacking another person’s character with gossip.
All of these words carry the idea of telling tales in order to harm
or destroy. While it is not part of the word, to be telling lies about
someone would be embedded in the definition.
To want information, or to share information, may be legitimate in
that one wishes to help, pray for, or support someone or some issue. Yet
this too certainly needs to be handled carefully. We have all seen on a
Wednesday night someone getting up to share about someone’s problems
“so we can all pray more intelligently!” Conversation about others
certainly has to be handled carefully. Our flesh often wants to hear in
order to just hear! To want to share in someone’s problems somehow
elevates us and gives power. “We know something that someone else does
not know!”
I could go to dozens of verses that prohibit gossip and slander. There are too many to list here.
Leadership (elders) may need to have information in order to correct,
chide, or even encourage. But that information should be kept
confidential. The congregation needs to know that such information will
be handled with wisdom and not spread all over the church. The apostle
James warns us, and reminds us, that the tongue is set on fire from
hell. It destroys people, and it starts wars.
The book of Proverbs says: “He who covers a transgression seeks love,
but he who repeats a matter separates intimate friends” (17:9). See
also 18:8; 11:13. Note as well 25:9: “Do not reveal the secret of
another, lest he who hears it reproach you.”
There are people who are destructive to Christian churches and
schools with their evil and with their lying mouths. Sometimes their
evil works have to be exposed in order to clear up the record and
restore the integrity of another. This is not gossip but bringing about
justice!
But finally, all “talk” must be handled carefully to make sure that the carnality of even believers is not running a-muck.
Thanks for asking.
Dr. Mal Couch
